The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree . . . and think 25 to life would be appropriate.
–Jay Leno
America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.
–Jay Leno
Q: Have you heard about McDonald’s’ new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
–Conan O’Brien
Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser.
–Jay Leno
Q: What’s the difference between Obama’s cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners.
–David Letterman
Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it started to sink, who would be saved?
A: America !
–Jimmy Fallon
Q: What’s the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers.
–Jimmy Kimmel
Q: What was the most positive result of the “Cash for Clunkers” program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.
–David Letterman