Death Penalty

There’s another email going around that contains some very valuable truths…

WHY I’VE DECIDED TO VOTE DEMOCRAT

I’m voting Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

I’m voting Democrat because freedom of speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

I’m voting Democrat because when we pull out of Iraq I trust that the bad guys will stop what they’re doing because they now think we’re good people.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that people who can’t tell us if it will rain on Friday can tell us that the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Prius.

I’m voting Democrat because I’m not concerned about the slaughter of millions of babies so long as we keep all death row inmates alive.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that business should not be allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrats see fit.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe three or four pointy headed elitist liberals need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit some fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

I’m voting Democrat because I believe that when the terrorists don’t have to hide from us over there, they’ll come over here, and I don’t want to have any guns in the house to shoot them with.

(I’m so Democrat that I have a big sign on the door of my house: There are no guns in this home! That, I am quite sure, will deter criminals. I think all Democrats should be required to display this sign on their home.)

I’m voting Democrat because I believe oil companies’ profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene but the government taxing the same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t.

I’m voting Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I’ve decided to marry my horse.

I really wonder why anyone would ever vote Republican.

I don’t care what happened to this animal when he was young. I don’t care what disadvantages he may have had. In my desire for justice I can only try not to think about any of the story. Small consolation is thinking about this guy standing before God, when this is all over, and reporting on how he spent his time and what he did with what he had. It’ll be a short report, I imagine, hopefully followed by a crackling sound, judging righteously, of course.

Perhaps the most frustrating thing here, and the gift the anti-death penalty (mainly left) lobby keeps on giving, lies with the sizable taxes I get to pay to keep animals like this eating for the rest of their wasted useless lives. Oh yeah, and even that doesn’t keep many of them away anymore. Life just means a couple more years to parole in the overcrowding we should no longer tolerate.

Why are those on the left for bans on the death penalty anyway? It’s an interesting question.

Reasons To Vote Democrat: A Quick List

Torturing Scum gets… LIFE! Hey NY, Time To Rethink The Death Penalty